WEDDING DIARY: CHAPTER ONE

c. 2006 Rod Ice
All rights reserved
(10-06)


When Liz and I picked a wedding date, it was merely a number on the calendar in her checkbook. No particular inclination motivated our choice. Only later would we realize that it was also ‘Sweetest Day.’ Yet this coincidence seemed to match our blissful notions about each other, and building a life together. It felt correct to begin our union at a time when the greater community was celebrating romantic affinity.
Odd vibes resounded when we applied for the marriage license, however. A friendly clerk at the county courthouse asked about our occupations. The answers were to be duly noted, according to official procedures. My bride quickly responded that she was a manager for Northeast Ohio’s most prosperous grocery chain. And I… wheezed out a hesitant excuse. "Uhh… my what??"
The word ‘unemployed’ was immediately typed into our legal record. Each letter ebbed an overabundance of incriminating, black ink. I felt completely embarrassed, confused, and unworthy. My bout of joblessness had begun unexpectedly, in June. "That’s going to be in our file??"
The clerk offered motherly reassurance. She spoke with a gentle smile of lipstick. "You’re not alone, I’m afraid. Think of all those TOPS employees…"
Liz felt no uneasiness. "Ohh, it doesn’t matter! We’re really getting marrrrrried!!" She squeezed my arm, lovingly.
Plans for the event were shaped by necessity. Our household budgets dictated minimalism. But we wanted to celebrate the day in full measure! What evolved was a small-town pageant that would convey in honest terms our love for each other. We sought attendance by family and friends with festive, homemade invitations. Our humble reception was to take place in the church gymnasium. I couldn’t avoid reflecting on a vintage tune by the group ‘ALABAMA’ that described our mood, perfectly:
HOMETOWN HONEYMOON
"Hey baby won't you take my hand
And make me a happy man
I ain't rich but I found my fortune in you
Two jobs on the nighttime shift
I'm still left with an empty fist
But my heart is full and my love is true
We can still get married in the style of our friends and family
Gather all of them to celebrate while we slip out quietly
And have a hometown honeymoon
Wildflowers and love is in bloom
We'll have a hometown honeymoon just me and you
Hometown honeymoon
Get out of church and up to your room
We'll have a hoe-down afternoon
Dancing to the rhythm of love
We can sing and laugh out loud
Lifestyles of the poor but proud
Cuddle up on the porch and enjoy the view
We can't afford Niagara Falls
But there's a fountain by the old town hall
We'll make a wish by the light of a lover's moon
I'll get my Grandma's wedding ring and my brother's Chevrolet
We can stay at your mama's house; we don't have to go away
To have a hometown honeymoon
Wildflowers and love is in bloom
We'll have a hometown honeymoon
Dancing to the rhythm of love
Your daddy's prize possession
I'll make a good impression
I'm gonna get his blessing that's all we need
Hometown honeymoon
Wildflowers and love is in bloom
We'll have a hometown honeymoon just me and you
Hometown honeymoon
Get out of church and up to your room
We'll have a hoe-down afternoon
Dancing to the rhythm of love
Hometown honeymoon
Hometown honeymoon"
(c. 1992 Josh Leo - Jim Photoglo, Warner-Tamerlane Publishing, BMI )
Meeting on Friday for the rehearsal at Thompson United Methodist Church brought everything into focus. Pastor Harley Wheeler guided us with expert care. Suddenly, the nuptials were no longer a distant dream! We practiced diligently, knowing everything learned today was likely to vanish in the glow of tomorrow. Liz fretted over details with her mother. My prospective father-in-law offered a gift of packaged ‘foot warmers’ just in case emotions ran out of control. And then… our final walk was underway. I would not see Liz again until she joined me at the altar.
I got home about 1:30 AM. An eerie quiet had settled over the house. Even with lights burning feverishly, it seemed dark. I turned on the computer and attempted to read e-mail. But my eyes were shot. Each line of text grew more fuzzy than the one before. Davie Allan, the legendary ‘Biker’ guitarist, had written to compliment my feature about his "Home Demos" CD-R. He asked about mailing a copy to Little Steven Van Zandt. Normally, I would have reacted with blistering speed. But my hands were stiff. Oblivion was perilously near. I had begun to crash…
Dream Wizards flicked stardust into my face. A journey to the netherworlds had begun. I was spinning into wild masses of multicolored vapors! My body met the bed, still fully clothed. Reality and slumber were united. I couldn’t divide one from the other. The walls fell away suddenly. My blankets flapped into flight! Strutting horns marched across the horizon, honking with urgency like the ‘AFLAC’ bird. Gold orbs swirled overhead. Pink elves danced on the floating pillows. They chanted nonsensical rhymes that soothed my fatigue. Fragrant lavender and vanilla sweetened the air. Then, my bride reached out from the haze. She wore a sparkling gown of pure white. Her girls followed, carrying bouquets adorned with tiny soccer balls, and dazzling crystals. "Come to me, Rodney," she whispered. "Give me your heart, forever… foreverrrrr…"
Saturday morning arrived with the subtlety of a garbage truck. It brought an intense wave of last-minute responsibilities! They landed rudely, as I returned to consciousness. On the list of needs were: roses, compact discs, a boom box, a camcorder, and a blender. Our ceremonial chariot (my black F-150 pickup truck) needed to be prepped for the festive trip. Then, I had to get properly dressed to participate in this formal occasion.
Hypertension took hold as I realized that the time had been exhausted. It was possible that I might be late for my own wedding! I ironed a shirt with seconds to spare. Somehow, peaceful calm held sway, in spite of the situation. I left for our church with fifteen minutes remaining before the joining was scheduled to take place. Playing from my in-dash stereo were quirky, 60’s monster tunes by Frankie Stein and His Ghouls. Though inappropriate, they reflected the childlike sense of wonder I felt at embracing this holy custom. Our special moment was here.
Today – I was marrying my best friend!
My father, a Church of Christ clergyman, co-officiated with Pastor Harley. They were both busy with preparations when I arrived. Happily, the crowd of guests helped hide my tardy appearance. Only Liz’s younger daughter seemed aware that I had slipped into the church. She hugged me playfully after running down the hallway. "Roddy! You’re here at last!!"
Organ music sounded cheerfully, as we took our places. I waited without moving for a first glimpse of my bride. When she appeared, I was overwhelmed by the moment. Liz glowed like a royal princess. Her elegance made me gasp. In a flash of emotion, I considered our four-year courtship. Destiny was at work. Love ruled the day with irresistible power. From the complex beauty of a single rose, our togetherness blossomed for everyone to share.
Pastor Harley spoke in tones of dignity and purpose. His words were familiar, yet new: "Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to witness the joining of these two souls in Holy matrimony…"
A new life was about to begin. Liz and I were taking the first step of a long journey into tomorrow!

From The Geauga County Maple Leaf Newspaper